Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Time

I have noticed as I get older time seems to shoot by without me really noticing.  For instance the last time I posted here was three weeks ago, although I could swear it was just last week.  When I was a child time passed quite slowly.  I have decided that as we age there is less to learn so more stuff just passes by without our notice.

I have made an effort over the last month to take more time for myself.  My younger daughter is quite needy and even though we see each other every day at work, she would have me spend every day doing something with her.  To be able to find time to write and enjoy my home, I have been telling her no more often.  Today I know she was disappointed, but I have an essay to finish for my women's story circle group and since I mailed out my memior query to some agents, I really need to get it finished.  And to do that I can't spend the whole day with her.

I hate putting pressure on myself.  I think in some ways it leads to bad writing and writer's block.  Setting a deadline for myself is the only way I am going to get this project done, and I need to get it done, so I can move on to something else.  Over the years I have writen many essays on my life on the farm.  The women's circle is helping me with that.  I would like to tie them together some how.  My novel is going nowhere but I would love to start working on another one.  I have several good ideas, but I have to give myself permission to take the time to write.

Time is flowing by far too quickly.  I need to take the time.  I need to say no to those who would waste it.  And most of all I need to give myself permission to be selfish with my time.  So off to write.

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